school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
