it glows. i had to have it.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
You pole danced in your parka.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
