do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
