I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
