The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
