I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
He shit in the fireplace
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
