I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
