nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
honey bunches of taint.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
soo... how was my night?
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