But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
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