it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
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