It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize