We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
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