hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
How does it feel to date your dad?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
