**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
