New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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