I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Green mimosas i think yes
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
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