What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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