why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
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