just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Randomize