Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
