one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
