glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
