Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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