There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Randomize
