You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Randomize
