my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
