That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
