dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
tequila makes me forget i have legs
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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