..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
