It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Naked. naked and bneed help.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize
