the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
