why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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