this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
