I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
