i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Randomize
