Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
