She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
