Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize
