For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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