She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
