I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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