At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I FOUND THE LEGS
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
