how can u be prego again
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
