I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
