Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm getting married
To pizza
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
