Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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