dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize