she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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