I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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