Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
