Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
