My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Let's get the cat blown out
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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