Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Randomize
